 |
| public domain, Wikipedia |
I dare you to write a few of your own, with or without a Seven Kingdoms. Go on!
* * *
First up. No cartoonist can resist this subject, and neither can somebody daydreaming a limerick of the political persuasion:
Copious Poof
There once was a brash billionaire
Who was blessed with abundance of hair—
Like a sweet guinea pig.
Or a polyester wig,
Or a billow of very hot air.
My natural bent tends to be apolitical, and I have to force myself to take “an interest” in the current slate of candidates. Luckily for cobbled-up interest, a traditional limerick should be a bit scurrilous….
Game of Thrones
Just imagine the spunk it would take
To be on the political make,
Always ready to hump,
To grind and to bump,
Like a frenzied, concupiscent snake.
Although I am not particularly a fan of politics, I am a fan of Emily Dickinson. Also frogs in bogs. And of fancy words in humble limericks. Dive in!
Dinner with the Stars
After Dickinson
How delicious to be a Candidate,
And to gasconade, guzzle, and prate
Like an eminent frog
In a notable bog,
For one hundred thousand a plate.
Perhaps 100K is a bit inexpensive these days? And here's a little bit about the jumble of promises abroad in the world in election year....
The Bait of Siren Songs
So you promise us borderland walls
And a passport to ivory halls
And no taxes, and we
Are to have health for free:
Like a Siren's, your come-on appalls.
Now it's your turn. Pay a visit to Limerick Town--it's a quick anapestic jaunt!
With forays into politics, always end on cake, if possible. So here's something sweet to end on: yesterday's pear cheesecake, made for Michael's birthday by our middle child. Was it good? Yes, it was!
I'm afraid that a proper limerick is not always 100% clean, even when 100% silly. Or maybe especially then. (Although I chose "spunk" for a different reason, before I saw where the poem was headed!)
ReplyDeleteO, but who could resist a frenzied, concupiscent snake? Political years are indeed orgiastic.
ReplyDeleteI blame these on hotheaded Facebook friends who hurl flaming spears!
DeleteI'm not sure exactly what the form of this nonsense poem is, but I woke up with it early one morning about 25 years ago after reading Edward Lear the night before: Rosemary Krantz
ReplyDeleteRosemary Krantz was covered with ants
because she sat on a hill.
What did she do?
She stripped (wouldn't you?),
and her clothes are lying there still.
Here's the political version:
The Cartoonist
Perhaps the cartoonist
ascertains soonest
who next will sit on the throne.
Wish he would tell us, vulva or phallus--
Ma Barker, or Al Capone?
Ah, poor Rosemary Krantz! That happened to me once, when I was a toddler and forced to pee in the great outdoors, which was full of fire ant beds. Alas. Embedded in memory.
DeleteAs limericks, they're wayward but lively and full of limerick-spirit. Thanks, Ms. Mary Boxley Bullington! <3
Ah, I see coarseness is permitted. Here's three for the price of one:
ReplyDeleteA writer of modest ambition,
Undergoing a late circumcision,
Said to he who was cutting:
"Please allow me to butt in,
I'm keen to lose no ammunition."
"Fear not," said the scalpel technician,
"You are part of a bookish tradition.
In trimming your member,
I'll not harm your gender,
Just bring out a smaller edition."
"I like that, it gives me a frisson,"
Said the scribe, "You have my permission,
To carve with free rein,
Taking care to retain,
A way to ensure micturition."
Well, coarseness is really part of limericks, at least until you get to nonsense rhymes.
DeleteHaha--no doubt you spent longer on yours that I on mine. Very clever.
I bumped into you on Beth Adams's blog, and I now know you are called ROBBIE.
DeleteBut never Roddie; that always sounds like short pants. By which I mean trousers not breaths.
DeleteShort pants! Yes.
Deletea juvenile effort, but mine own...
ReplyDeletein dutch with the local police,
we ate three doughnuts apiece.
while stuffing them in,
we soaked up some gin,
which fueled us all the way to Nice...
Mine are quite juvenile in spirit (and in rapidity of execution!)
DeleteSo fun! Doughnuts and police are such a good comedic conjunction. I expect they'll never shake that linkage, or at least not for another century...
A tongue primed for folly and malice,
ReplyDeleteBut a hide that is lacking in callous,
For it seems the sting lingers
From jibes at this fingers--
Their construed as a sneer at his Palace.
Oy. "They're".
DeleteAt last a political one! Thank you, George. Enjoyed.
DeleteThere was a fantastic old geezer named Kasich
ReplyDeleteWhose policy was not so basic
Unlike Trump or Cruz
His speeches made me snooze
Cruz was spastic and Trump bombastic
But Kasich was too genteel to be toxic and ended up with a delegate count that was static.
Haha--you crammed a lot in that last line! Thanks, Kirby!
DeleteFun!
ReplyDeleteCommit!
DeleteObsessed with a limerick today,
ReplyDeleteMy poor warped wits gone astray;
It's all i can do
to tie my shoe
And bolt out the door to go play.
sorry. it's kind of hard to stop...
Yes, it's a dangerous country, the land of Limericks! <3
Delete